Valentine's Day

*** So this year was probably my best Valentine's Day to date, more on that later when time permits, but I really liked this, so I'm re-posting Sam's Valentine's day post that he re-posted from last year:

"I decided to re-post this, written one year ago. It's still quite relevant for me, and circumstances are eerily similar. Have a great VDAY!
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Today is February 14th. The gears of the semester are beginning to grind, as they invariably do. I have just recovered from a week long illness that had me bed ridden for two days, and I am only starting to regain the edge I had forged on my classes and crazy schedule. My life is filled to the brim with meetings and study sessions and the various “recreations” of a second year university student trying to keep up appearances and scholarships.

Fortunately, I have friends here that come take care of me. Fortunately, I have family who send me meds and congratulations. And fortunately, I am not in a state of spiritual and emotional confusion that marked the past semester. But others are not so fortunate. And today is a day when those who, like myself, have never had a significant other to look to on this day – today is a day that those people are tempted to spurn.

It forces this certain insecurity to the surface, and that is, the security of someone else’s arms. It is an insecurity because many people do not have, as I said, that security to run to.

Something that this sickness gave me, a blessing in disguise, was an enormous sense of clarity.

Clarity came for me after exhaustion and confusion. It comes to recharge and refocus.

Sometimes we look at our circumstances in life, and we wonder why we must endure. Whether they are difficult classes, financial question marks, relationship blunders, singleness – you fill this part in with all the ridiculous scenarios we face- and it seems easy to lose heart.

But I say take heart! It is Valentine’s day anyway.

We approach what I will describe as deserts in life, and we are daunted. This semester is in many ways one of those times for me. But I have found balance in understanding two things: 1.It is not for me to decide the unforeseen factors that mark my life. There is purpose that comes from God because He is sovereign, and much of the time, I don’t understand that sovereign purpose. Time is steady and change is certain. The past is not malleable and the future is not entirely in our hands. 2. It is not for me to dwell on all of the above. That is certainly not where peace lies, anyway.

We often talk of the major and minor questions that mark our lives. It seems to me that we live in a state of anticipation for whatever is to come instead of living where we are today. And so we are not fully present. We miss opportunities. We miss smiles, and relationships, and lessons. At times I am swept away by longings and questions and desires and hopes and yes - frustration. And I think that to remain in that sorrowful or pensive state is very selfish of me. It produces a completely “self absorbed” individual. And it hinders us from learning - true - but also from loving.

Here is an excerpt from C.S. Lewis – “Learning in War – Time”

“Never, in peace or war, commit your virtue or your happiness to the future. Happy work is best done by the man who takes his long-term plans somewhat lightly and works from moment to moment “as to the Lord”. It is only our daily bread that we are encouraged to ask for. The present is the only time in which any duty can be done, or any grace received.”

And so it is right now for me. I am crossing my fingers and my t’s – working hard in what I have before me, hoping in what is to come but not staking all on what I do not know. You cannot give yourself to something that has not yet come to pass. Give yourself in this day. Reason bids me to do so. After all, It is not in blind fate or fortune that we hope and trust for whatever is to come, but it is in God!

People probably read about the idea of “seeking God” and getting “clarity” from Him and find it funny or ridiculous. I won’t attempt to explain this mystery, but I will quietly suggest, to those with disbelief, have you ever asked God for clarity? This is what His word says.

Matthew 7:7 “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.”

After all, Christ exhorts us to cast our burdens on Him. Matthew 11:29-30 "I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."

Perhaps the reason you lack clarity right now is because you have not asked for it? I hadn’t. And it came in an unlikely package. But then, I don’t think I would have slowed down to listen for it.

Best to all of you on this fabulous day."

- photo courtesy of meghan burkett's wedding, friend from high school.