In the silence of the heart God speaks.

Today was the most amazing day. Mostly because it was spent with several interludes of silence.

Practicing silence is something I’m learning to do, especially in the midst of a busy, noisy world, I’m seeing the quietness and the peace that comes only from God is possible and available in the midst of anything.

This wasn’t a voluntary lesson.

But once again, I am floored by the providence of God. How He always knows what I need more than I do.

Those words don’t even do it justice.

But, it’s the start of a new semester at the women’s ministry I attend at Woodcrest. I absolutely love it and it is feeling like home. I am learning that I live and breathe women’s ministry and just going and being a part of theirs is a highlight in my week. I love what the leaders do, how they talk, how they live. I love the women I’ve been in groups with, how honest they are with where they’re at, how they don’t understand God, yet how they live to seek Him.

Well, for this upcoming semester, one of my mentors from there strongly suggested that when it came to picking which book or bible study I would join in the Thursday morning women’s ministry thing, that I pick the one that has the least amount of homework.

If you know me, you know picking the easy option isn’t something I would want to do.

But she strongly suggested this because of the fact that I would also be taking recovery for the first time and the course I am taking, Shelter from the Storm, has a lot of intense homework assignments she wanted me to focus more on.

So I agreed.

Last week, was the opening for women’s ministry and all the leaders go up and pitch their class. I remembered her advice to be open to where God might be leading me, not necessarily which class I wanted to sign up for.

There’s a new Beth Moore study on Esther that really grabbed my attention. But I did a Beth Moore last time and know that I could go and just watch the videos, but I got so much more out of it when I could be faithful to the daily assignments. So I knew that wasn’t going to work.

Then there was one on The Shack and one on Abba’s Child. Both books I have read or am currently reading and both books I love. That will be great I thought.

Both classes were capped at 10 and for some reason I signed up late.

So, when I heard these two older ladies describe No Greater Love, a book by Mother Teresa and that their class with start with a Nooma video, have very little homework, and would seek Christ in silence and simplicity, I was like nah.

But I put it as my third choice. I got the email later last Thursday saying welcome to the class and was less than thrilled.

Last night, after sorting through some situations going on and feeling my anxiety start to rise, I decided to take a break. And then I decided I’d go out and try to find the book. Got the last copy at Barnes and Noble, had 30 minutes before I had to be somewhere, so sat down and read it.

The first few pages totally nailed me and I knew why I was in this class.

It was exactly what I needed.

My deepest need at that moment was to be confronted with silence so I could hear the voice of God.

Moments before, when I decided I needed a break, I was at my house. Alone. It was quiet. Too quiet.

There’s something about silence that screams the truth.

Yes, I got that from Pink’s new song, but it is a brilliant line.

That is exactly why silence is uncomfortable.

But today was the best day in a really long time.

Mostly because I experienced a peace and power that only comes from sitting in his presence.

And doing nothing.

And learning how to be still.

I realized I make this so complicated. Sure, I have time to be still just about every day and I have a lot of “alone” time.

But silence and solitude, and doing nothing but listening to God speak is an entirely different thing that I don’t make time for all that often.

The sweetest things happened today in my heart and in my life.

There was a peace I cannot describe.

And I love my new group! These women are awesome. I feel like I connected and got to know these women more than the women I was with all last semester in my Beth Moore. Mostly because watching the Beth Moore video takes a lot of the class time and you have 15-30 min. to discuss after the video versus an hour and a half. And I felt like I belonged there. I am still the youngest in the whole ministry, out of 200 women, but in this class I really felt like I had something to offer and I was accepted with the women and could engage. And I am going to learn something from every single woman in there. They are all so dynamic and unique and in different places yet so beautiful.

We were all floored; a few other ladies admitted how this class wasn’t their first choice. But our leader is phenomenal. I can tell she is going to be someone I really like.

And everyone was so real today and talked so freely.

Silence is hard no matter who you are.

But I’m really excited for this because it’s no accident that I’m in there.

Today there were three different crises situations other people were calling me about and I noticed a difference in how I responded to them, when I responded to them, and how I felt about them. It was almost as if I was able to see completely with a bird’s eye view today and see things for a moment how god saw them and not participate in the drama, but be for and about his purposes.

And I kept the radio off driving around most of today, just trying to silence the noise more and more and driving around town to appts. and errands was so peaceful.

Then my cell hone, I kept it on silent after bible study till about 4 pm, I still checked it, but just now hearing noise all the time the phone rang or a text came in was so peaceful. It’s the little things like keeping a phone on silent or keeping the radio off, however it looks for us, that can help keep us connected to God’s presence in our lives.

There’s a lot I learned today that I was chewing on from the chapter last night, the video today and discussion today. Here’s some things I will be sitting on for a while...

“In the silence of the heart God speaks. If you face God in prayer and silence, God will speak to you. Then you will know that you are nothing. It is only when you realize your nothingness, your emptiness, that God can fill you with Himself. Souls of prayer are souls of great silence.”

“Listen in silence, because if your heart is full of other things you cannot hear the voice of God. But when you have listened to the voice of God in the stillness of your heart, then your heart is filled with God. This will need much sacrifice, but if we really mean to pray and want to pray we must be ready to do it now. These are only the first steps toward prayer but if we never make the first step with a determination, we will not reach the last one: the presence of God.”

“Sacrifice and prayer complement one another. There is no prayer without sacrifice, and there is no sacrifice without prayer.”

“My secret is very simple: I pray. Through prayer I become one in love with Christ. I realize that praying to Him is loving Him.”

- Mother Teresa, No Greater Love