The blessing of marriage

So how is married life??? It’s a question you get asked by about everyone you see after the wedding. It’s a legit question, it's logical, people just want to know, so do you feel different, what is it like now that you’re married, how has it been?

Sadly, I’ve found finding my answer to that question much like getting asked a million times during support raising, so how is support raising going?? By everyone who genuinely cares about how it's going and how you're doing.

You just don’t know where to start!

But, the two second version is that I have been pleasantly surprised yet at the same time humbled. More in awe and wonder at His grace yet in deeper need for it more each day.

Everything I thought would be a big adjustment or would be weird has felt totally natural, like you know I didn’t know what it was going to be like living with a boy, waking up next to someone, doing life day to day with them, but all of these things have been wonderful and a pretty seamless transition. After the first night in our new home, it felt like, man our dating and engagement period seem like they lasted just a few weeks now that we are finally here. Finally together in our home. I feel blessed to be in this season with Ben. It has brought a freedom, a depth and another evidence of grace in my life and God's goodness.

On the other hand, how is married life includes the more humbling part of it all for me… it’s married LIFE. We all know life still goes on. We all know that there is life beyond our wedding day and we like many other of our friends spent a lot of time in our engagement period preparing for our marriage more than our wedding day, yet there is still so much that does not change, but yet it all feels different.

We are still in a tough season. Wrestling with my health from day to day and the uncertainties of so many facets of our lives. It is like everything changes overnight, but everything seems the same all at the same time. Yet, overall, I love being married to Ben!

It is an incredible feeling to have God bring along that person that so gets you and loves the deepest parts of you, whom is a partner, best friend, lover and spouse, someone who can make you laugh till your side hurts and moments later someone you can share your tears with, someone to live each day with, as we seek to follow, know and love our Father more. Someone to share life with, the beautiful parts and the difficult ones. I feel so incredibly blessed to be this man’s wife. Each day, getting to face our battles together, getting to know him more and falling more deeply in love, is a blessing and a gift.

Lord, we belong to You and You alone. We give You our very lives, all that we have and this marriage, for it is Yours. Guard and protect us from the Evil One. May we fall more deeply in love with You each day, May we ever long to see Your face.

We had this prayer below read towards the end of our wedding ceremony by two of my mentors from Woodcrest, while we had a handful of mentors in both of our lives come up during the prayer to be a part of this blessing and commissioning of us as a couple. It was a way we were able to acknowledge and honor the people who have influenced and impacted our lives and our spiritual journeys, recognizing that just as singles we couldn't have done it alone, this new stage of life is no different. It was also a way for them to stand together and support and participate in a blessing for our marriage as we entered this new season.

This was our prayer that day as well as day, in the beautiful words of Louis Evans, (special thanks to Kate Kromann for sharing this with me at my shower!!!)

“O God of Love, you have established marriage for the welfare and happiness of mankind. This was your plan and only with you can we work it out with joy.

You have said, “It is not good for man to be alone; I have a helpmate for him.” Now their joys are doubled, since the happiness of one is the happiness of the other. Their burdens now are halved, since when they share them, they divide the load.

Bless this loving husband.
Bless this loving wife.

May they never make the mistake of merely living for each other. Teach them that marriage is not living for each other. It is two uniting and joining hands to serve you.

Give them a spiritual purpose in life. May they seek first the Kingdom of God and your righteousness; then the other things will be added until them.

Loving You best, may they love each other the more, and faithful until You, be faithful to each other.

May they not expect that perfection of each other that belongs alone to you. May they minimize each other's weaknesses, be swift to praise and magnify each other's point of comeliness and strength, and see each other through lovers' kind and patient eyes.

Give them a little something to forgive each day that they may grow in the grace of long-suffering and of love, and may they be as forbearing with each other's omissions and commissions as You are with others.

Now make such assignments to them on the scroll of your will as will bless them and develop their characters as they walk together.

Give them enough tears to make them tender, enough hurt to keep them humane, enough of failure to keep their hands clenched tightly in yours and enough of success to make them sure they walk with You, their God.

May they never take each other's love for granted but always experience that breathless wonder that exclaims, “Out of all this world, you have chosen me.”

Then, when life is done and the sun is setting, may they be found then as now, still hand in hand, still very proud, still thanking God so much for each other. May they serve You happily, faithfully, together, until at last, one shall lay the other in your arms.

This we ask through Jesus Christ, the great lover of our souls. Amen."

-Louis Evans